"Come as you are, as you were, as I want you to be"

So we left off with Spaniards claiming my brain and now we are entering Nirvana.

One of the noticeable similarities Dan and I had at the time was a low self esteem. It was thought to be a result of fatherless, but over the years I have come to see that it was more due to the environment in which we were raised.

Regardless, we both had a low self esteem when it came to social interaction. This had to change. Dan decided to run social experiments, basicaly he put himself into the situations he wanted to be good. I went to the bible.

As I studied, I came across a verse I had read many times before that for some reason hit me like a brick.

Romans 8:14-16 For as many as are led by the Spirit of God, they are the sons of God. For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father. The Spirit itself beareth witness with our spirit, that we are the children of God:

So not only are we sons of God, but He didn't give us a spirit of bondage, He gave us a spirit of rebirth in Him. This changed me at the core. How could I ever fear any social situation again knowing that I am what God says I am and that is His son.

The only down side to this story is if Mr. Cobain had known this, maybe he would still be with us. But then again if he had maybe we wouldn't have such good songs. And of course he did say he found it hard, it's hard to find.